Hawaii stole our rain.

and we want it back! you've had a record 40 days of downpours while we West Texans have already forgotten what moisture looks like. how selfish can you be, Hawaii? you're already surrounded by a freakin' ocean! and your plants are green and lush year round. hell, even your damn coconuts have enough fluid inside them for use in case of emergency. what the hell do we have? here, the grass that hasn't caught fire has crumbled into an unrecognizable powder making this wasteland look like a desert. any vegetation that has miraculously survived is naturally spiny and withered anyway so no help there. we're bigger and badder, and we will go kick your ass if you don't straighten out. and don't try to beg us for mercy just because you're part of the U.S. you can be replaced. the Virgin Islands have been vying for your spot for years, you know.