i quit.
i am no longer participating in activities that distress me, take too much of my energy, are boring, involve the words low calorie or diet, and/or don't involve a non-English speaking hunk named Franco. (these stipulations are subject to change and revision at any time.) so to begin my soon to be long list of banned activities, i will no longer:
1. drive in reverse. yes, it takes too much energy to move my shifter two inches.
2. say hello when i answer my phone. instead, i will just grunt or wait silently for the other person to start speaking.
3. pretend i'm listening when people make small talk in public places. it may be impolite, but i really can't participate in this pointless farce just so people can pretend they have friends when they don't.
4. pay bills. it makes me feel tired and frustrated so it's out.
5. remain sober for class. drunken stupors didn't keep me from not learning in high school so i'm sure they won't keep me from not learning in college.
6. eat dessert after dinner. whoever created the rule that dessert comes after you've already filled your stomach with less worthy provisions was a complete imbecile.
7. censor my language. fuck, fuck, asswipe, fuck.
8. pretend i don't follow Days of our Lives. yes, i'll yell it loud and proud. i know who really fathered Belle's baby!!!
so far, these particular items are the ones i'm working on eliminating from my life. as i mentioned, the list is fluid, and i will add or detract as i deem necessary.
1. drive in reverse. yes, it takes too much energy to move my shifter two inches.
2. say hello when i answer my phone. instead, i will just grunt or wait silently for the other person to start speaking.
3. pretend i'm listening when people make small talk in public places. it may be impolite, but i really can't participate in this pointless farce just so people can pretend they have friends when they don't.
4. pay bills. it makes me feel tired and frustrated so it's out.
5. remain sober for class. drunken stupors didn't keep me from not learning in high school so i'm sure they won't keep me from not learning in college.
6. eat dessert after dinner. whoever created the rule that dessert comes after you've already filled your stomach with less worthy provisions was a complete imbecile.
7. censor my language. fuck, fuck, asswipe, fuck.
8. pretend i don't follow Days of our Lives. yes, i'll yell it loud and proud. i know who really fathered Belle's baby!!!
so far, these particular items are the ones i'm working on eliminating from my life. as i mentioned, the list is fluid, and i will add or detract as i deem necessary.
posted by christine on Friday, February 17, 2006
1 Comments:
i've totally tried the "what" when answering the phone! great minds. i, however, went with the more classy "what the hell do you want?" and, to top it all off, by answering the phone that way, there are added bonuses. one, it helps me achieve my goal of lack of censorship (numb 7.) second, it intimidates my neighboring co-workers so much that they don't make idle chit chat with me anymore (numb 3.) concerning the Cadbury eggs for breakfast- eggs are technically breakfast fare. right on!
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