R.I.P.

it seems the person we have all come to know and love as the most intelligent person in the world has passed on to the other side. what began as a mere cold slowly progressed into something equivalent to an apocalyptic plague. from there the situation only became more dire. no amount of Nyquil (aka nectar of the gods) or curanderismo could rend her from the steely grip of the inevitable. perhaps only her mother's heavenly (and low fat!) chicken soup could have slowed the process, but alas, there was no time. so she shuffled off this mortal coil earlier today, and she will be greatly missed. the family asks that, in lieu of flowers, cash gifts be sent to her last earthly residence.