ketchup

-weird searches are bringing people to my blog. i'm getting a lot of people who are looking up "squeaking bras." i didn't realize that this issue was so widespread. it should be addressed by people who actually have influence! why aren't the presidential canditates making it top priority?! we can't have these squeaky bras ruining people's lives. also, "purple Klingon blood" is bringing people here. i'm not sure why. i'm neither Klingon nor purple-blooded.

-yesterday i became the epitome of gluttony. i arrived at work where my peep was making everyone breakfast burritos. i ate some of those. by the time i was done gorging, my peep was making us all fajitas and stuffed japs. so i ate some more. a guy brought me Valentime's candy so those went down the hatch. then the Girl Scout cookies arrived. you'd think i couldn't eat any more after that obnoxious display of no self control, but you'd be wrong. i got more Valentime's candy. then when i got home, i made spaghetti. this morning we had donuts at the office to celebrate Valentime's again. i didn't eat those. i'm already pushing the limits on my office chair's weight capacity...

-i know that for the past twelve years i've been saying i'm going to go watch Juno, but i mean it this time. i'm going tonight. for the reals. it's true.

-someone from my past has resurfaced in my life. he texted me last night trying to be elusive, i think. but i guessed who it was from his user name since i know him so well. he seemed happy when he learned that i was newly single. i'm glad to have him back in my life.

-Tangerine Dream is trying to poison me. if i croak, put him on the top of the suspect list.

-i sent a mass text out to my good friends that said, 'happy Valentime's Day! love you!' but i forgot that i had put this guy on the list. i just met him. we've talked but nothing major. anyway, he probably thinks i'm a nut case now that i told him i love him. i had a good laugh over that one after i realized what i had done. but really who doesn't like to be loved? i could have told him i hated him with the fire of a thousand suns. so it could always be worse.

ketchup

-NaNoWriMo is coming up, and i don't know if i should even attempt it because my life is crazy, but at the same time, i should be able to write a novel in a month now that i don't have school. i mean, i wrote one earlier this year in a matter of days thanks to my ever present procrastination tendencies. i'd create a poll or something to see what you guys think, but i'm too lazy. maybe that's my first clue that i should not participate...

-i'm becoming a man hater. i don't really want to because i'd like to find another one, but i can't seem to help it. i'll make a note to post about my ideal mate so you guys can keep your peepers peeled. (well not you, Tangerine Dream, since you can't afford to peel yours anymore than they already are.)

-Halloween is nearing, and i don't know if i want to dress up this year. i'm just not feeling festive. if, however, i run across a costume that reflects my bitter, man-hating attitude, then perhaps i will. i wonder if they sell Rosie O'donnell masks. on second thought, cancel that idea. i don't have enough padding to pull that one off.

-they gave us gumball machines at work. they're ESPN promotional items. no gum, though. i think i'm going to stuff mine with Xanax. that'll teach them not to give us empty gifts.

-i got more gift cards for Bath~n~Body. and one for Express. i have hit the motherload! someone loves me.

-i've been thinking of doing something drastically different with my hair. i dyed it a nice brown the other day on an impulse, but that wasn't a big enough change for me. it's really long so maybe i should cut it. or maybe i should dye it again. if it wasn't so damn straight, i'd kink it up into a fro, but my hair just won't do that.