more reasons Lubbsucks

1. every street around Tech is torn up in preparation for a freeway. i can barely navigate myself around town when cones and blockades aren't forming impossible mazes. next time, i'm just going to close my eyes and go.

2. the damn bookstore that claims it's "run by students for students" showcases Tech in all its glory. i called one location, after not finding all my books at two others, and it literally rang for five minutes. (i timed it on my cell.) it quit ringing when i hung up and not when they answered.

3. a CVS is being built right across the street from another one. i don't think i need to even comment on this.

another sleepless night...

wtf?!?!

personal crisis

yesterday, after i finished attending all my classes, i was relieved because i felt that i would survive the semester. i'm taking some difficult upper level courses, but it didn't seem like more than i could handle. quite frankly, i've had worse, i think. but this morning i woke up with an oppressive feeling that i just can't do this for another year. i work a lot of hours, and i just don't have the strength to keep up with such a demanding school load. i'm actually considering cutting back to part time and just taking an extra semester to finish. honestly, i think i feel this way because i haven't slept in a few days. i keep tossing and turning and waking up feeling like i didn't sleep at all. i might be a little hormonal, too. i'm going to take the weekend to do some deep contemplation and talk it over with Bitter Half. i'll keep everyone posted.

bitching and moaning

i have a pet peeve. it involves Bitter Half doing the dishes. now, i live in a nice area of town in an inexpensive apartment. the reason my rent is dirt cheap is because the apartments were built in the stone ages. in fact, the complex is pretty much carved out of a cave that had the primitive drawings whitewashed off the walls. anyhow, my dish washer is pathetically old. it doesn't have fifty jet spray nozzles with whisper quiet action, and it doesn't come in colors that soothe the eye. you can't overfill it, and you absolutely must prewash all dishes. i figure that's fine since my rent consists of a fraction of other peoples'. no matter how long B.H. has lived here and no matter how many times i've lectured him, he stuffs, crams, jams, and squeezes our entire dish supply into the damn thing. he also firmly believes a pass under the faucet constitutes prewashing. i always have to rewash and redo the dishes when he loads the washer. he's probably fine with the way the dishes come out of the machine after he loads it and would be happy sticking those disgusting dishes into the cabinets. why? because he's a man. okay. i'm done bitching and moaning. (for now, that is.)

i'm bringing sexy back to the office.

i have a wide taste in music which surprises a lot of people who don't know me very well. i like everything from opera to booty music. (in case you don't know, that's the kind that makes you want to shake your booty.) i also like pop music but rarely enough to buy it. i do, however, like Justin Timberlake. i like his new song and was listening to it on my iPod at work just now. well, i was really into it and getting my groove on. i didn't notice someone had invaded my cubicle and was watching. i should have charged her because this show's not free, you know.

My Cubicle

since i was waxing poetic about my cubicle a few days ago, i thought i'd post a little vid about it, too.

random personal news

1. Bitter Half quit smoking a few days ago. since ol' Trent Reznor felt he needed a break after a two year tour, i've put a countup timer in the concert countdown slot to reflect B.H.'s success. if anyone has tips or suggestions that might help him, feel free.

2. Tangerine Dream has moved to Lubbsuck. i'm glad he's here so we can wreak havoc and mayhem everyday, but i no longer have an excuse to just pick up and go to Dallas for the weekend. it's probably for the best, though, because my stupid school schedule is going to strip me of all freedom.

3. speaking of my stupid school schedule, i had to schedule all my classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. normally, i try to spread them out because, as you know, i despise Tech with every corrupt cell of my being. this coming semester, i'll be going from 9 to 5 with no lunch or bathroom break of any sort. it's kind of like how i picture hell.

4. i'm only eating Taco Villa burritos. i think i'm turning into one. (well, maybe i just need to hit the gym.)

gym pet peeve #6,358,498,595

why, if there are about 30 pieces of cardio equipment just like mine available, would people get on the machines right next to me? we live in America, and although we bathe regularly, we don't like being next to people unless there is no other option. my fabulous good looks and superior intelligence aren't going to make you more popular or a better person. it doesn't work via osmosis.

one long, sleepless night

1:00 AM- i begin wondering if i should hit the hay because i have to be up by 7AM for work. i'm not sleepy, and i'm busy watching TV so i push any thought of responsibility out of my mind.

1:30AM- i go to bed where i proceed to toss and turn for what might actually be considered eternity.

3:30AM- Bitter Half gets up to load up the car because he's ditching me for the weekend, that bastard.

3:40AM- B.H. is still not back upstairs and i'm beginning to wonder if he joined that party across the way that was about to get some wild weasels thrown at them for being so rowdy.

3:45AM- no sign of B.H. and the party seems to have quieted down. i'm seething because i can't sleep until i know B.H. left me the key to his car. i graciously let him take mine in a moment of insanity. plus, the front door is still unlocked and might as well have a giant neon sign advertising a single woman asleep.

3:50AM- i hear the door open and B.H. rummaging around. i prepare to give him the eye rays of death when he goes into the bedroom for being so loud and annoying.

3:51AM- B.H. comes in and gives me a kiss and tucks me in. my evil plan of pure evil dissipates.

i toss and turn some more, but then i finally fall asleep. i awake later and realize my bladder is so close to bursting that i might need emergency care at any minute, but i decide to turn over and ignore it. when i can't sleep, i decide to go ahead and get up for the day. when i grab the alarm clock to turn it off, i realize it's only 5:30AM. wtf?!?! i go make pee pee and return to bed.

7:01AM- the alarm goes off. i reset it for 7:30. why i didn't set it for 7:30 in the first place is a question for the ages, i'm sure.

7:30AM- i rise and shine and give God the glory, glory.

8:45AM- i send an ugly text message to all my coworkers advising them that my partner in crime is MIA and i won't have any support until 10AM so they'd better leave me the hell alone.

9:25AM- i'm sipping coffee and enjoying blogging while no one bothers me.

Good morning, starshine. The Earth says hello!

don't ask me why, but i've watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory an embarrassing number of times over the past few days. i'm also absurdly obsessed with Willy Wonka's perfect teeth in the movie. they are creepy yet beautiful at the same time.

i hate change. it sucks more than when i accidentally punch the wrong number in the vending machine and get a Payday instead of a brownie. there are changes afoot at work, and i don't like it. i hadn't mentioned the fact that my company was recently sold to another company because, quite frankly, it's a touchy topic. there weren't too many changes that affected me right after the sale so i was A-okay. now, the powers that be are implementing change that affects me. i'm probably going to have to move offices which means i'm losing my Dilbert cubicle. now, i haven't always had a Dilbert cubicle. i used to have a nice desk. when we moved offices before, it took me a long time to become accustomed to working behind a wall. now, i like it. i don't want to have to look at my coworkers. i don't want to lose all this space and freedom. (you can see my beloved cubicle here.) unfortunately, i start school in a couple of days and don't have the time or energy to worry about it any more.

i'm skipping the gym in order to go home and sulk. i've been feeling very sulky lately. the gym would probably help me shake that feeling, but what's the fun in that kind of personal growth?

i'll take potpourri for $2000, Alex.

you know how they sometimes have the potpourri category on Jeopardy? it's just made up of a bunch of leftover clues that never got aired. this post uses that concept. it's just a bunch of crap, really.

so, i haven't been posting lately. why? i've been kinda down. i think part of the reason is that i start a killer semester in a week, and i'm in the dumps about it. goodbye life. goodbye all inklings of free time. goodbye TV and sleeping late. sigh.

i paid half of my tuition yesterday. i also made the mistake of looking at my credit card bill before i signed my life over to Tech. i think i had a mild seizure, but i can't be sure because i also blacked out.

i think i was bitten by the tse tse fly yesterday. in case you don't know, it's a fly that carries the African Sleeping Disease. once you're infected you get sleepier and sleepier until one day you don't wake up. i didn't actually see the damn fly take a bite out of me, but after i went to the chiropractor, paid my tuition, and ate lunch with Tangerine Dream and Bitter Half, i was exhausted. i reclined on my futon and sustained myself with trail mix.

i just went and had a pow wow with my boss to figure out how the hell i'm going to work when i'm going to be living at school. i'm pretty sure the schedule we worked out has me working 10 days a week. don't ask me how that works out. we also decided that sleeping was a luxury and not a right.

our vet called and asked us to take in two homeless weasels because we're the best weasel parents ever. i made the mistake of going to look at them. upon contemplation, b.h. and i decided we could not take in any more responsibility. good thing i've taken sleep off my agenda. otherwise i'd be haunted by those two little critters in my dreams.

i haven't gone to the gym since my return from Vegas. i'm officially a disgusting, pasty slob. i'm going today after work.

i've got nothing else to say, but i'm trying to make this post freakishly long so when people stumble by, their pathetic pea sized brains go into overload and start to sizzle.

thoughts from my Vegas trip:

1. people are huge. yes, that's right. hu-freaking-mongous. next time i go, i'll need to gain five hundred pounds to fit in.

2. old people take their gambling seriously. it's a ritual and a rite all in one, i suppose.

3. i barely escaped severe bodily harm this visit. luckily, instead of broken bones, i only returned with many, many bruises.

4. next time, i will only stay for four days. six days was too much for my poor, pathetic body to endure comfortably. i'm either getting old in age or too healthy and therefore unaccustomed to Vegas toxins.

5. hitting one of the trendiest nightclubs in the country was truly worth the money and effort. anyone without a pocket protector should give it a try.

6. my next trip will probably be a graduation trip so it will be chock full of extravagances. i better start saving now.

i'm back.

and i feel like i was hit with a bus. i'd blog more, but i need some rest. don't worry. you'll hear all about the crazy trip soon.

also- i just dreamt i stabbed my ex with an umbrella that Tangerine Dream stole in Vegas. i wonder what that thought means...

boo hoo hoo

well i'm leaving for Vegas tomorrow morning, and i'm not boo hoo-ing about that fact. i'm probably going to leave my laptop at home which makes me sad. i won't be able to update or keep up on everyone's blogs. who knows? maybe i'll take my precious after all.

on another note, i cut off all my hair and dyed it blue. it looks fabulous!!!

making fun of celebs

yesterday, i was watching videos, and i noticed some disturbing things. Kelis, grills are hideous on men and plain out fugly on women. what the hell is your problem? Beyonce, you look even better now that you've lost some weight, but bust out the tweezers already. it took half the video for me to realize the caterpillars on your face were really your eyebrows. Outkast, lay of the drugs for a little while. your video both gave me the creeps and made me swear off hallucinogens for good.

i'm too busy to post.

and bitter half seems to like the Star Wars themed vids so here's a couple more. (this first one is episode 2 of the Chad Vader story. you can see episode 1 here.) the second one is Darth Sidious trying to find a suitable job after the demise of the empire.

the highlight of my day

i did many things today.

- i got up early to look over my notes but ended up spending most of my time online.

- i went to the store where i literally shoved my credit card in the dude's face so he'd quit waiting for the second coming of Christ to ring me up. i then proceeded to charge a whopping dollar and some change (and that was only because i bought a pack of gum to raise the total.)

- i aced my final.

- i ran some errands.

- i bought a book for my trip.

- i had a facial.

- i ate Cocoa Pebbles for lunch.

- i came to work which is where i am right this second.

and yet the highlight of my day was when i retraced my route from yesterday and found the purple pen i dropped on campus. can you believe it? Tech has one of the largest campuses in the country, and i found my itty bitty little pen. it's a gel ink one. they're not cheap, you know.

i don't even feel like posting.

i keep having dizzy spells. i sent an email to a coworker that stated that "i just got really dizzy for a few seconds so if you walk by and i'm passed out on the floor, will you just put some mini cones around me so we comply with OSHA?" he said okay.

no one gives a shit about Mel Gibson and his drunken tirades. well, at least no one should. all i have to say about the matter is that his mug shot looks a billion times better than most celebrities', and i don't think he should be making the top news for being a dumbass.

i'll be in Vegas by this time next week. dear old Dad is house sitting. i told him he could order pay per views since i don't really pay anything for them, but i hope i don't come home to a 6 billion dollar bill because he is a bit of a movie fanatic.

i'm thinking of cutting my hair and dyeing it blue.

bitter half just made my day by bringing me a tea to work. i was dehydrated and grouchy, and i sat outside with him for a while. he made me laugh. now i'm still grouchy, but at least i'm hydrated.

this post sucks ass.

i'm adopting this new work out.

say it isn't so.

yesterday, i got out of class pretty early so instead of going to work, i went to the gym. i also went the other day when class was cancelled. here's the thing. i like going early in the day. it kind of gives me a little energy boost, and i'm actually thinking of getting up early from now on so i can get in an early bird work out. this thought can only mean one of three things:

a. i'm getting old. it's inevitable, but i refuse to believe it's already happened.

b. i'm becoming self disciplined. this one's a shocker because, unless you're born that way, self discipline usually only comes with parenthood (and sometimes not even then.)

c. i'm a freak of nature. this choice is probably the most viable because i'm also contemplating opening a sammich shop when i graduate just so i can eat sammiches all the live long day...

of course, i'm only thinking of getting up early to work out which is by no means a binding declaration. if i decide to stay in my comforter nest until noon, that's my business.

i hate shark week.

if you don't know what shark week is, you're lucky. i, unfortunately, had to come home to find my DVR stuffed to the brim with stupid shark shows. bitter half is such a dork.